Time to raise your mojo!
Join my 21 DAY Passionful Life Challenge with activities backed by science so they can uplift and bring you to more joy every. single. day. No catch, just catch me on instagram or sign up below! It's a free challenge because you deserve to be happier and I'd love to be a part of it!
See you on the passionful side!
ASK Teany Q&A Question
This question got me a little emotional as I read it and wrote a response. It's going to ring true and perhaps painful for those frustrated with their careers and change. But what you should know is that you actually can give thanks for your past careers at any age. Read on.
Question: Which path should I take at 45 years old??
Need guidance and opinions please. I am 45 as stated. I have a liberal arts bachelors from a very "prestigious" school. Due to a variety of factors that have mitigated my path, I am now 45 working for the state in a comfortable, easy but poor paying job. I have a resume that reflects many years of experience in a specific niche of social services. It doesnt reflect anything outstanding, eye catching, or reflect my true capabilities and strengths, but has garnered me a small place in the area of social services I have had jobs in. So at this point, not only am I extremely disastfied with my "career" (it can hardly be called that), but I really need to make more money. I want to go back for a masters because that seems to be the best option based on the jobs i see that I would like to apply for but am lacking the requisite schooling. i also love school and never dreamed I would end with just a bachelors. I am not in a position to do some "crazy" shit like entreprenurial or sales etc. Like i said I have some serious mitigating issues which constrain me. The idea of doing anything at 45 is daunting. I am in a position right now that people are usually in when they are early 20s. I do not like social services at ALL but its what I have been doing for 15 years, so I feel like i need to stay within that realm but do not want to become a master level social worker or anything like that. My true interests seem so irrelvant at this late stage in my life. I cant decide what to go back to grad school for. MBA? MPA? masters in legal studies (I LOVE law and did a year at law school long ago)? Masters in public health because the health field always seems healthy. I am not sure exactly what I am asking here beyond opinions from people my age group about not necessarily "starting over" but furthering oneself financially and employment wise. i have always had shitty paying jobs and have never been able to figure out how people make real money. It has always seemed a mystery to me which probbaly doesnt bode well for my outlook or confidence. There just seem to be some type of people who "make it" and make good money even in the most seemingly random careers/jobs whereas I cant imagine getting past paycheck to paycheck living. What's the secret? Do I have a mental block? Thank you!
If you haven't heard it before, or maybe you forgot or just didn't pay attention - it doesn't matter what age you are, what work you've done, or what circumstances you're in, you have learned so many skills already that make you an incredible asset. Especially having worked in social services.
I say this with authority because after seeing the statistic, which you will appreciate, Pews Research states that the type of skills that are going to be a key asset as we move forward in careers is not analytical, its actually soft skills - the very one's you've developed. The days of an anti-social tech geek that codes in the dark with no human interaction is almost gone. Now you actually have to have key social skills, curiosity, adaptability, resilience critical thinking and a personality to match.
Also it pains me to hear you say that 'your true interest are irrelevant at this stage. Listen, you're not going to retire for another 20+ years and at the rate they keep moving the retirement age, it might be another 30+ so let's just say that you've got plenty of time to start 'another life' so to speak and actually ENJOY it this time :)
That said, you seem to 'love' law which are very big words for some who shortly before said your interests are irrelevant ;-) AND the combination of legal studies and social work skills you've gained sounds like an amazing combination esp. in the field of law. We seriously need more empathic people who care there.
The way to make real money as you call it is to pursue something that you are so passionate about and get so good at (did you catch that... you can GET great at something, it doesn't have to be innate), that you become an expert in your field. The go to person so to speak. It already sounds like you have a fiery personality to boot, so use that charge to fire up your zest for law, and use the emotional intelligence and empathy you've gained from social work to truly create an amazing combination.
I helped a client who asked a related question. He loves music and even started to produce an album, but seems to still want a practical job in computer science/tech. Sooo I said what seemed 'logical' ... ‘how about you combine your passion for music with tech and create software/apps/programs for people in the music industry that you yourself can test out on your own side projects.’ That gave him a solid goal that he could truly connect to emotionally and the practicality to make money from in an industry that is probably over a billion dollars.
Bottom line, don't sleep on the skills you've learned and the passion and interests you have. FIND a way to combine them and make something perhaps no one has done before or at least no one has done like YOU.
Cheers to your future!
ASK Teany Q&A Question
Wow, I've never seen so many likes and views on this question! I'm guessing people want to know what to avoid in careers. Read on.
Question: What glamorized career path is actually a complete nightmare?
So here's the deal... any job can be a nightmare if your mindset about it is off. For example if you go into a job just because you need the money, or for some desperate measure. Or if you take on a higher position because you don’t want to look bad in front of your boss or you’ll never get asked to be promoted again. Those are all not so great ways to set yourself up for success.
Aside from your own mindset about a job I have to say that watching many artists (singers, actors, etc.) their lives are also not as glamorous as they look on the stage. I just watched the documentary on Lady Gaga and she has suffered greatly in her career.
However, she finally learned to say no to what she doesn’t want to participate in and say yes to that which actually fits perfectly with who she is, what she wants to represent and her passion. She talks about mindset too. Check it out.
Ultimately its all about what career/purpose fits with your personal vision. Anything that messes with this ends up becoming hard to handle.
Hope that helps!
The truth is any job can be a nightmare if pursued for reasons that break your values, goals, desires and passions. So choose wisely!
Need help with this? Take the Life Passion Quiz to see what values are most crucial for you and where you current job doesn't live up to it. Then get 1x1 help with the Purpose with Passion Program.
In my first Ask Teany Q&A I answer this very question. I can totally relate. Read on.
A recent client asked:
What if you are no longer interested in your current career path because you're not happy with it? You want to give that up and start a new chapter in life. You're not sure that your friends and family support you. How do you find motivation to do it anyway?
So many are in jobs they don't love ... anymore. If this is you, then keep reading for help on this very topic. Then COMMENT below on your personal journey or ask me a question.
I resonate with this on so many different levels and had this pivot point happen to me several times, hence why I became a Purpose Coach. Couple things I learned:
# 1: You are your worst enemy in your mind - so ignore the neg, and focus on all the reasons you should switch. Your family, friends etc. who you think won’t approve… yeah that’s all in your head. It was in mine. As soon as I told my family I was changing gears they were all in favor of my happiness. And let’s be honest those that aren’t happy with your decisions, probably have there own personal stuff going on that has nothing to do with you. That said, doesn't hurt to learn more about what you actually would like to do before you take the plunge.
# 2: Go with your gut/intuition on what to do next. After 9 years working in corporate I hated my job. I liked the people enough, but I wasn't doing anything meaningful or contributing to anything but the bottom dollar of the company. I made the choice to take a 3 month sabbatical or you can take a brief vacation, whatever works. THAT was the best decision ever. It helped me clear my mind and focus on what I truly cared about, my values, and potential options.
#3: Research research research. After you start figuring out what you’re passionate about and potential purpose-driven gigs that matter to you - research. I discovered ppl I could shadow, schools where I could audit classes, or open houses where I could ask questions. The more information you have the more of an informed decision you can make and the less scared you are to tell your family and employers what you’re about to do. Knowledge is power. :)
#4 Full emersion is the key after that. Learn as much as you can, even if you have to take courses at night, research on the weekends, etc. The more you get into what you’re into, the more it fuels your motivation. Trust me when you find it, you’ll see its natural to be motivated even if a little scared. I was in school at night for almost 2 years and enjoyed every minute of it. I found a job in the field as soon as I was done and was super passionate about it!
Now go get em! :)
Is this you and you need more help moving past the hurdles? Take the free quiz to see what the major blocks to your career happiness are. Then schedule 30 min for a personalized session and get your purposeful journey going.
HAVE A QUESTION: Ask Teany via email or leave a comment below.
Cheers to your purpose with passion,
If you want to know how to evolve your business and move with the times so you don't become a business statistic and die within a couple of years, watch this! Then connect with me to get individual Purpose Coaching.
Check out the Talk recorded live for the Passion to Profits Conference!
10. Solo time isn’t boring, it’s a gateway to new ideas
People who heard me wanting to travel solo (and believe me there were many who wanted to join me) said OMG won’t you be bored. What they don’t know is that I was gifting it to myself on my big 40th birthday not just as a present but as a meditative practice.
When you have no tasks to worry about, people to take care of, and work to go to you get put in a space of peace and potentially joy. For me it’s a meditative practice to travel and disconnect from my responsibilities for a short time to open the space for new ideas, new people, new opportunities, and new anything that can come to mind now that I have more time dedicated to think about it. It’s a free open canvas.
How often to we get that opportunity in our day to day? We don’t get them too often normally but having these experiences travelling gave me the ideas on how to add more of that and even help others with it. PLUS, it opened up my energy to figure out ways to add more fun and amazing things to the people in my life and even at work.
Space, peace isn’t boring, its opening up a gateway to new ideas and all you have to do is allow it.
ASK YOURSELF: When was the last time to spent quality time with YOU? How can you incorporate more you time in your day?
9. You either growing or dying.
When I first heard Tony Robbins say that I was taken aback by those harsh yet truthful words. But the truth is I see evidence of this everyday. The people who haven’t found meaning and joy in their lives are often the one’s biding time and withering away. I know because I have some of those in my own family.
The moment that you stagnate, which is normal and part of life, what you can do is to start appreciating what you’ve experienced already. In the moment you are able to do that you give more meaning to your life. This feeling can then translate into wanting more and adding more to that because it helps you recall the feelings behind it.
Don’t let those times go to waste. Take advantage and do something! Whether its travelling, learning something new, meeting new people, or having some new experience … do something that will add more to your life than what you do day to day. It’ll add perspective, energy, vitality and joy!
For me travel adds all those things. It’s a multi-disciplinary treasure of energy that fills me. If you’re game, travel can do that for you too!
ASK YOURSELF: When was the last time you learned something, grew from something, and truly engaged your mind?
8. Travelling solo isn’t selfish, it’s necessary
So many don’t travel because they don’t want to be selfish and take away from family travel time, or responsibilities and engagements. Having a day job, a couple of businesses, a child and family that rely me I can tell you that taking this time for yourself isn’t selfish its necessary.
YOU MUST FILL YOUR CUP. Now you don’t have to do months away or even weeks away, do what you need to give you the time, space and peace of mind that you need to recharge.
What’s selfish is not recharging while giving away your energy and time to tons of other people all the time. They in fact are depleting you and taking away from your needs and not always in an obvious way.
Love yourself by taking the time to travel and recharge outside of your everyday.
Then you can actually share the experience and bring people with you next time!
ASK YOURSELF: In what ways can you love yourself more and be selfish and in order to have more and be selfless (time, money, energy)?
7. YOLO is a BS motto to LIVE BY, LIVE passionately everyday
After travelling with groups, with family, with single friends, with my son, and now alone I can tell you that travelling because YOLO is BS. I certainly don’t just plan to do what I love with travel because I’m afraid of not doing it in the future, or dying prematurely, or only having 1 opportunity to do so.
I’m not going to start smoking just because YOLO since I’ve never done it before it. It has to be something meaningful that I’d definitely want to potentially do more than once.
In fact, now that I’ve done it, I’m planning to do more, with and without people, to close and are away places, for business, pleasure and everything in between.
WHY? Not because YOLO. BUT because I LOVE it. I’m passionate about it, and I want to.
ASK YOURSELF: What have you limited to bucket lists or yolo experience that you want and could potentially have more than once?
5. It’s not about escaping reality, it’s about enhancing it
So many people want to leave their lives while they are on vacation because they work too hard, work too long, and use up all their energy. While vacations definitely help replenish your energy, it’s not about escaping your reality because of this. It’s about going out and exploring outside your typical day to day life, to enhance it.
When I went to Greece this past month (July 2018), I learned so much about the culture, history and its people. Its not only taught me a whole lot but replenished my soul. It enhanced my view of my life and the world as I watched a whole other people live and love life in difference ways.
ASK YOURSELF: Next time you go on vacation, ask yourself instead of escaping how can I enhance my current life while I’m away.
4. It’s not about being alone, it’s about self-discovery
Everyone asks me why in the world I chose to travel alone this time. Did you not find anyone to go with you? (no, everyone wanted to fit in my suitcase) Did you want to escape your family? (no, I love them all and travel with them often) Did you want to be alone because of overwhelm? (no, I’ve learned how to balance my life with work/play)
One of the main reasons I chose to travel alone is because I wanted to explore MYSELF more deeply, aside from the place/people/culture I’d get to know. If you are constantly around others, doing things, going places, and handling your day to day business so to speak, how will you ever learn yourself? Did you know that most people are a mashup of other peoples likes/desires/choices. They say you are most like the 5 closest people in your life.
Why? Because proximity is power.
So if you are alone, you have no one to change/guide/influence you. That means at every second of every day you get to make choices based on your own desires with no one pushing or swaying you to do x, y, z. Talk about an amazing way to know yourself.
For a fun way to see this lesson watch Runaway Bride with Richard Gere and Julia Roberts.
ASK YOURSELF: What area of my life do I want to explore more intimately alone?
Quick story about life in Greece: They actually do the Eurostyle 2-3 hours siesta in the middle of the day but instead of going to nap like the Spaniards do, they go to the beach. After all they have tons of islands to choose from. Then they go back to work until 8 or so. Not a bad life to live even if it does extend your day! What if instead of taking that smoke break, we take a walk in the park, around the block, to the otherside of town, whatever you can manage? What if you find a different way to get to work and back? What if instead of putting your head down when you pass by someone you don’t know, you say hello? What if you just do something different that adds someone new and fun to your life?
ASK YOURSELF: What can I do to live in more peace and harmony with my own life?
2. It’s not just about the beaches; it’s exposure to the unknown
I love the beach and the pools. Those are great memories to have with family and friends. But what I will never forget is what I get a glimpse of outside of my own life that I would never have known if I didn’t travel outside my comfort zone. And by the way it doesn’t necessarily have to be another country.
Vacations can include everything you desire – relaxation, good food, drinks, people and it can include an education of a lifetime. You won’t get to that if you don’t travel outside your comfort zone.
Folks in the states (USA) are notorious for staying in their own state, and even their own city. In Europe it’s a different lifestyle of traveling to the next country for the weekend, learning languages, tasting different foods, and taking advantage of options. When was the last time you travelled to another state to do something different rather than visiting a relative or going to the Florida beach?
One of the things I received in my College Education is training to love exposure to a little bit of everything. I took classes from philosophy to art, from chemistry to Women’s studies, from computer science to visual arts (which ended up being my major and minor by the way). So maybe I learned early on that learning new things outside of my comfort zone was interesting and sometimes even fun!
People are very used to being comfortable, and travelling the path most travelled. In the past it kept us safe from danger. What we might consider doing as we get older is becoming daring and open. The best way to learn and grow is to expose yourself to things you’ve never seen or done. After a while it becomes easy, exciting even FUN!
Broaden your MIND! And then you can help others do the same by sharing it.
ASK YOURSELF: Where can I take the road less travelled and risk in order to add more joy and fun to my life?
Need a push to invest in your soul?
Book a 45 min discovery session with me or join the Purpose with Passion Bootcamp. I'd love to help you continue your life as an adventure!
Your Purpose Coach,
When I did this on May 6 I was at the cusp of a mile stone age that I was and still am determined to prove myself to. The BIG 40! I absolutely believe I feel and should continue to feel 10-20 years younger (at least). The idea that age is nothing but a number is absolutely true IF you can maintain yourself in a positive, healthy, and prime state. That’s my GOAL!
Positivity and all similar emotions – love, joy, happiness, excitement – all raise you endorphins levels or come from raising you endorphins. Guess what can actually lead to this?? That’s right, running. Now obviously its not the only exercise that does this but its been proven to overthrow even depression because where there are endorphins (happy juice) there can be no sadness. So get your running ON!
But first let’s talk about Health, Priming and MOFO goals.
Health at its best encompasses mind/body/spirit and so with this in mind I’ve been continually (over the last 14 years) adding, removing, and changing my personal balance. Whether its diet, exercise, or mental/emotional health I’ve spent years finding my ideal state and experimenting with what works for me. I have felt my best and my lowest, and am always reaching for better. And each decade or milestone in my life has taught me what is next and what I can do better. It’s a continuous process of self-improvement that has really been a fun journey. Especially in moments like these where I can reach fitness milestones when people assume you can’t.
PRIMING yourself is something I talk about a lot in my coaching programs. I learned it with Anthony Robbins in his UPW Live Event as he had us breath and over-oxygenate our bodies while we express gratitude, bring energy to our bodies and envision our goals. It’s exhilarating! Why not add those physical, mental and energetic elements to our mornings? It’s a great idea to practice the things that will set up your day for ultimate success in all areas of your life. And I guarantee that doing this helped me run this 5K because its not just physical fitness, but mental fitness. For more on priming, research Tony Robbins.
With the pre-training pieces in place and my goal of 5K in mind I set out to train and triumph on my run. I have to tell you that I was already fairly healthy but not without some glitches. I had been suffering from knee complication after 14 years of snowboarding and torqueing my knee; as well as, a funny right rib which the doctor tells me is a just a beautiful unique deformity yet it crushes my organs if I exhale heavily and deeply. I would get pain consistently when I tried my hand at running several years ago and subsequently stopped because of it. So why would I continue to run??
Determination and conviction to best my body and let it get the best of me!
This time I decided not to let my body dictate my success or my ability. I took it easy and trained lightly while I navigated and tweaked my routine to accommodate for any limitations. And low and behold my body became strong enough that pains were minimal or non-existent over time. My knee pain subsided, and I was even able to manage to maintain my breathing so that it didn’t bother my ribs.
And that point I said in the beginning where you think you can’t run anymore and then you do. I cried and well that was the highlight of my run and my true breakthrough moment. I felt such a rush of gratitude for my family, friends and true appreciation for my ability to be my best even with what I thought were limitations.
TRIUMPH WAS MINE!
Thank you to those that came before me to show that it can be done and that your body can truly be as fit as you want it to be at any age. YOU CHOOSE what you believe you can do and the life you want to live. Let's continue and improve that legacy.
Your Purpose Coach,
This year is a magical year for me - it's my 4th decade of life! And instead of making this a mid-life crisis as many do/have done, I want to make it the evolution of happiness in my own life. So I created a "Happiness list" - a list of all the things I'd like to do that make me happy and inspire me to truly LIVE and GIVE day after day. Before you ask, no this isn't a before I 'kick the bucket' list. I never quite understood why we have to be so somber about doing the things we've always wanted to do. And by the why is it a 1 time deal? I plan to continue to add to this list from now on - its the only way to FLY! The challenge of intentionally living to the fullest starts NOW!
Sedona is where happy people live!
Well that's the slogan on many articles of clothing and souvenirs. It might be the consistently hot/dry weather, the gorgeous red rock mountains or maybe the energy vortexes under the earth that according to the locals raises the energetic vibe of everything and everyone there. Either way I can tell you that I came back happier than when I left and with gifts that keep on giving. (more on that later)
Sedona has been a place I've wanted to visit for years now because of all those things and I opted to go alone because sometimes you get a calling. Do you know what I mean? It's the call of your soul wanting to know you better, go deeper, and grow more profoundly. Traveling in groups usually means you're at the mercy of the group decisions, likes/dislikes, and schedule. Being on your own, in a place you've never been, with an open mind and itinerary gives you FREEDOM. And that freedom let's you explore places and things you may have never tried otherwise. It tests your personal limits, openness and gives you an opportunity to know yourself a heck of a lot better. My goals: Be open. Be bold. Make friends.
And then there was Cathedral Rock... *gulp*
So I already told you that Sedona is home to the most beautiful red mountain ranges ever right? Well one of my goals was to scale one of these mamajamas, as far as I could go... and did I mention by myself? My lovely AirBNB host highly recommended Cathedral Rock for its most beautiful views but he neglected to mention that it was a much harder trail. So here I go, water bottle, snacks, camera, sneakers and the will to make this happen.
It was one of the best moments of the trip. My resolve was completely tested here as I went higher and higher up the mountain - no helicopter to save me in sight. 1,000's of feet in the air and no pillows to fall on. Was I scared - YES, was I going to do it anyway - YES! Luckily I made friends along the way, including a lovely couple from Philly. We took turns going up the mountain and inspired each other to reach the top. Boy was it worth it! The pictures don't do it justice, and the feeling of accomplishment, and reaching a personal best in hiking is something I will carry my merit badge in heart forever.
I also earned a few badges for bravery - not just because of the mountain but because I embraced new people, new ways of living (much healthier), and even went to places by myself where I'd likely be alone and have to fend for myself so to speak (a local karoake bar comes to mind). Even ladies from the Bronx get scared sometimes but I was a trooper and exposed myself to the new new, as one of my Spiritual Teachers says.
So what did I learn?
For one, always carry sunblock because if the locals say it'll take less than an hour to scale/walk, rest assured your vacation mindset will allow you to enjoy it for hours. And after all it's desert weather :)
Two, don't be so focused on capturing the moment in pictures that you lose focus on the moment itself. Sometimes you only get a second to feel true beauty in that time and space and if you're busy trying to grab it at the right angle... well you just missed it. Just breath it in first, pictures later.
But most importantly, mindset is everything. Going into this trip with an open agenda, mind and heart allowed me to learn what I'm made of. It - time and time again - tested my goals, my true level of openness, and my trust in life. Trust that you get the experiences you are meant to have, in the moment you have them and for a good reason. Then find the deeper meaning in them. Use THAT as fodder to move forward, love more and give often.
More HAPPINESS LIST check offs coming up! #5KRUN #40AndThriving #purposeWithpassion
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I've been through 3 MAJOR shifts in my life and boy did they bring out that passion in me!
Each lead me to where I am, and no step was badly taken as I learned from every single one. And most importantly I learned that the journey brought me closer to discovering my inner passions.
These 3 major shifts in my career occurred since college. My passion(s) made an appearance each time and I say that with an S because at each stage I was sure I knew what I was interested in and what I was passionate about. Having my strong-willed and energetic personality and went for it full throttle. Why? Because I felt it in my core and my heart and ie. It resonated with exactly where I was in the moment. So the truth is you have many passions, and they may change at various stages of your life.
In college I realized engineering was not my passion, not because I wasn’t a problem solver, but because the semantics and details were not stimulating enough or creative enough for me. I wanted something that would help me be more creative and grow.
In 2008 while in the middle of my tech/design career, I had been working on integrating a newfound value for contributing to something greater, and realized the job I had while I was good at it and it used my talents of creativity and problem solving, was not really giving back or helping people in a bigger way. I needed more meaning!
Now in 2012, I was on a search to bringing all the talents I had fostered to even bigger heights and add spice to it. That career had to have all of the other aspects creativity, problem solving, and contribution to something greater. And now it had to have a deeper sense of passion! As I searched for it I realized how much I could help others with their own self-discovery and how I really had this deep passion all along.
So in 2017 I started working on a new coaching program after watching sooo many people feel miserable where they were working. Can you imagine spending 8-10 hours at work unhappy? I had to shine a light on that inner fire that was burning within.
I created the Purpose with Passion program which is meant to help you become aware of where you tripped up before, and get you connected to your own core so that when you are presented with options based on your open gifts, talents and ambitions you can then trust your own guidance about what truly lights you up. And not only that but it helps you EVOLVE and keep fostering high performance habits that you can carry in to all areas of your life.
I'm using everything I've learned in my life, and skills in corporate america interviewing, hiring, training and leading; as well as, all the intuitive and energetic work in wellness that has helped me understand peoples deep feelings, motivations and how to bring it out.
Learn more about the Purpose with Passion Bootcamp here.
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In service and light,
Inner Bliss Coach Teany
Every day is an opportunity to own and work the heck out of the freedoms you have. And guess what, somewhere in the world people are striving to have exactly the freedom you have right now. Examples like running fresh, clean water; ability to wear whatever you want; ability to have food/drink at your grasp or the local grocery store. If you don't already have this, well what freedom do you have? Think about it? It can be as small as ability to breath freely without equipment, walk around without crutches, laugh and smile at a moments notice. Those are surely free.
Happy FREEDOM Friday!
Here's a ditty that definitely did not get enough airplay from Pharrell Williams called Freedom. Enjoy!
In service and light,
Inner Bliss Coach Teany
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If over 19+ years in Corporate America, licenses in massage. energy work and purpose coaching, 1000's of client sessions and good old fashioned life taught me something, it's that life is worth living and living passionately!